Boys don’t cry

I am certain that some of you may have come across this beautiful short film by Vinil Mathew.

STOP CRYING- ARE YOU A GIRL-BOYS DON’T CRY – how convenient it is to label crying as a girl thing. Is it not the same to squishing two birds with the same stone?

I have read somewhere that sensitivity is the sign of life – Better hurt than hardened. Stone is hardened but it’s lifeless too!

Toughen up boys‘  is the most common expression we get to hear in real life. I’m curious, what does the word tough mean? Toughness does not mean lacking emotions and sentiments for sure. Toughness does not mean wearing an armor of denial either. Is it right to throttle the real self and fit into the picture of macho-ism the society has fabricated. Hitting a woman does not make a man-a more-man. I want to tell all such-to save your outrage for things that matter.

Tough are the ones who recognize courage at the heart of vulnerability, are righteous and open hearted. Tough are the ones who do the right thing irrespective of circumstances. They are not the ones who bow and give up, but rise above them. It is the character of the man’s mind which defines his toughness.

Are we raising our boys right by molding them unnaturally at a tender age? Should we not stop categorizing emotions based on gender? Should respect be not a precursor to “man”-kind only?

I don’t know what the future holds for me, but If I happen to mother a male-child (though I secretly wish for a girl-child 😉 more), I know what are the basics that I am going to teach because in the end the open-hearted wins and inherits the earth.


Yaa gotta see the baby

I  think of myself as someone who has never been a great hit with kids, more precisely the small kid – one that is incapable of expressing. Leaves a lot to figure out for you. ..Crying probably needs to sleep.. Crying probably needs food… Crying probably gassy… Crying probably needs a change of diaper. Argh! A lot of guess work in the end. How on the earth can one decipher sounds like owh,Eh,Neh,Eairh,Ehhh.

Do they mean like :

Owh – I’m sleepy / change me 
Eh – Burp me /change me / I’m sleepy
Neh – I’m hungry/change me yet again/ I might be sleepy
Eairh -I have gas

If someone invites me to see their newborn.I am mostly clueless about the behavioral protocol.

Mother of the baby: You wanna pick her up?

moi: Aah jez, I better not.

Baby enthusiast comes to the rescue:I’ll pick her up! (Sigh of relief -yayiee I am saved)

Reinstating – I am not a child hater either. Guess the idea of hurting the little fragile being keeps me at bay . I am always scared to hold the tinny-tiny one picturing in my head that I might accidentally drop and hurt it (yes- I have a vivid imagination and all is not rosy in there :-P). Like oil and water, we never really make an effort to mingle. Even in the same glass, we maintain our densities. I like admiring the small ones from a distance :-P, good, as long as they are in someone else’s arm.

But, well perceptions do not always stand the test of time. Do they? Mine are busted too! It is one cloudy afternoon of July that I am introduced to this kiddie-wink and I fall in love the moment I Iay my eyes upon her – pretty much like love at first sight.Her name is Annika – my niece. She has the perfect angelic face and a naughty glint in her eye. Little can you do and not be drawn towards her. Apprehensive as always, I meander just close to her. My cousin – the father, initiates me to hold her for a while.I take anxious reluctant baby steps towards her. I hold her with utmost care and the connect is almost instantaneous. She is perfectly warm and soft like a ball of fur. She keeps tilting and rubbing her head on my shoulder, brushing her cheeks on to mine. Her belly making strange, funny noises. It is one of the most beautiful moment that I cherish till date! I keep rocking her and singing a lullaby until she is asleep. As I write this post – I miss her her infectious giggle that cheers every bit of me.  Cuddling, snuggling this munchkin will be perfect right now or at any moment 🙂

Anikka -the kiddy

Quoting Chandler Bing in verbatim –  someone that small can’t be scaryonesies She has liberated me in a way. Kids out there – Booyah you don’t scare me-No more!